Ooh, What's Yellow and Square and Goes up Your Butt? Spongebob Thermometer!

That's right, I found it in Walmart today. Naturally, I steered clear of it, but one day, if the normal people in my life will let me, I'm going to head back with a camera to take a picture of it. So, what is it? It's a thermometer, of course. Your typical thermometer with Spongebob sitting on the top of it, although he has no legs. Anyway, the package clearly states that said product can be used rectally, which sent nasty images into my brain. You know what makes it scarier? It plays music! You read right, when the thermometer finishes its thing, it plays a little tune from the show.

Now, this begs of the question of who, other than kinky people, would actually use this thing? "Honey, you will not stick Spongebob up our son's rectum!" I can see the angry parents now. There are so many Spongebob items you could put on shelves that are cool and don't scare people off, yet they had to go make a thermometer. That's just wrong. I'm leaving now before my innocent little brain suffers from more trauma. I'll be back with a picture, maybe...

Spongebob Turns 10!

That's right, nerds, rejoice! I'm pretty sure that Spongebob is Nickelodeon's biggest, nerdiest, and most optimistic character ever. Invader Zim's Dib might be smarter, but Spongebob is classic nerdyness. As you can see, I chose a picture of him sporting those awesome jellyfishing glasses.

So, in the spirit of nerdy goodness, what makes Spongebob so...nerdy? First of all, look at how he's dressed! It screams geek. Second, he watches hold TV shows as though they're brand new, arranges his desk in a way that's almost reminiscent of Mr. Monk, and has an obsession with karate, even though he's no good at it.

You also have to give props to the show for showing kids that you can have a good job that you love even without a college education. That's not to say that college is bad, but I think that too much pressure is placed on getting into college. Heck, the only college educated character in the show (that I know of) is Plankton, who is reportedly 1% evil, 99% hot gas.

Just here wishing Spongebob a happy birthday. Hope he's got many more to come.